Hannah made a good plan for her story and then wrote her first draft. With the help of Isabella and Chanel, she added more detail to make her story come alive. Please leave a comment to let her know what she has done well.
“What do you want for your birthday Alannah?” asked her Mum.
“I want a dog.”
“Sorry, I can’t get you a dog. I don’t have enough money.”
Alannah ran to her bedroom crying.
She woke up on her birthday. She found a box beside her bed. She lifted the lid a little bit and peeked in. Two soft ears! A furry tail! A pink nose!
“A rabbit! I wanted a dog! It’s not fair! It’s my birthday!” she sobbed.
Her Mum came in. Alannah tried to look happy. “Thank you for the rabbit.” But deep inside her heart she really wanted a dog.
Day by day Alannah came to love her rabbit. Rose the rabbit was very loving. Rose the rabbit was very sweet. Rose the rabbit was very smart. She was so smart that she learnt to do tricks. A backflip! A massive jump! A cartwheel! She could beg and dance and play dead.
While her dad was reading the newspaper at the dinner table Alannah noticed an ad on the cover. PET SHOW THIS SATURDAY.
At the pet show Alannah felt nervous. She told herself “it’s okay. It will be just like at home, but with more people. Rosie will do her
And she did.
Alannah took the trophy proudly from the judge. When she showed her dad, she told him “who needs a pet dog any way? My rabbit Rosie won the show!”